Faithful and True

I know it's been a minute since I have written. The pace of Life really picked up after Christmas, and while I've been thinking and mulling around a lot of things, I just didn't really think it was appropriate to share publicly. My apologies. Writing is something I love to do, and I try to only do it when I can be loving in my writing. I hope that makes sense. 

With that out of the way, this weekend our family traveled north to Pennsylvania to celebrate the wedding of my oldest son. What a joy and what an amazing time we all had. I was fully prepared to allow the tears to flow, and I surprised myself by not becoming a sobbing mess. I kept it together and now here today in the privacy of my own home, I'm letting it go. 

As I watched the wedding festivities unfold, I couldn't help but thank God for His faithfulness to me in spite of me. As my son sat up there beside his beautiful bride, and my husband stood behind the podium blessing their marriage my eyes wandered to the complete row of children sitting next to me. A whole pew full of my people. My heart and mind went back in time to the very beginning of my and Tony's story. It could have had a different plot line and different characters. I could have been somewhere else instead of sitting in this church right now.

Most people know my story. I was a junior in High School, a good girl, a straight A student, college bound. And then I stepped off the path and there I was pregnant and finishing up my senior year studies at home. I thought my life was over, at the very least completely altered and scarred beyond recognition. But I had a great support system, women who would remind me that God is faithful even when we aren't.

Fast forward a few months and I've moved with my parents across the country with my 6 month old baby to a new state, a new city, a new church. And I'm thinking, God has given me a new start! But who is ever going to love me and this little baby I have so selfishly brought into this world? Then the pastor's son starts paying attention to me and I'm thinking of all the people to date this guy, I'm really not the best candidate. But then he tells me that my little boy is beautiful and takes both of us out on dates, not just me. I mean what kind of a guy does that? This cannot be right, but God sends people into my life in this new church that don't even know me yet, but tell me, it's ok.

And even in the midst of the difficulties that I created for myself, God kept reminding me that the decisions I made for my future would have repercussion on this baby. That He had a plan for this child even though it seemed like I had messed up. That this boy would be the cutest little boy we had ever seen, that God had caused this move to North Carolina that would completely change my life. Sometimes we get things mixed up and think that God does all the work. His work in our lives is strategic, but He requires that we do something too.  

So many years go by and that pastor's son loved my son and me more than I could have dreamed. Tony was grafted in to the Goodman family like a natural born child, they treated him with all the affection that his siblings receive. There is no difference. They gave him their name and they loved him with all of their fierce love. 

This boy, now a man, has found and married the love of his life and we are so grateful to God for His never-ending faithfulness to us. I got to hear my husband, who God sent to us so many years ago, remind our son that this new stage in life is what he raised him for. I could not have asked for a better father to my children. Tony's siblings were all present and beaming with love for their big brother and his wife on their special day. Hearing all of the new family members and old friends speak of their love and admiration for my boy was more than I could ever ask for. I was blessed to be a witness to the faithfulness of God in my life and also in my son's life. That things could have been so different for us, without the hand of God at work in our lives. That wedding day was a timestamp on the completion of only one part of God's faithfulness to us, but He brought it to completion. 

Let me assure you, that my life is not perfect, it is a daily walk with the Lord. A daily decision to follow Him. And I didn't share this to boast on anything that I have accomplished or attained. Far to the contrary on that note. I desire that you, the reader, will be encouraged in your own life, that those promises of God will be fulfilled, that your own mistakes don't make anything too difficult for Him. 

1 Thessalonians 5:24 He who calls you is faithful; he will do it.