Know Now

There are times when words just won't come. There is so much to think about, mull over, contemplate. When life gets difficult my tendency is to turn inward and upward. I find myself spending more and more time in quiet situations, which if you know anything about my husband and kids, you know that is a rare commodity around the parsonage. Two months of no writing, just sitting and thinking and praying.

When I start feeling the urge to write, I jot down some ideas, and then I let them stew for a few days. I wait to see if those thoughts stick and are still relevant to share. In these past two difficult months, I've felt stretched further than I thought I could be. At times I am reminded of delivering my babies and those moments when I was quite sure I was gonna die right there on the hospital bed. As natural as child birth is supposed to be its incredibly scary and painful and so much longer than you can possibly imagine when you're in the midst of it. There is no hiding the blood and sweat and tears and the very personal nature of it.

That's where I'm at. I know that all things are working for the good of those that love Him, and man, I love Him. I know that I'm called according to His purpose. I know that my life is to be lived for His glory. I know that He is good and He loves me. I know that He is God.

And right now I'm reminding myself to just be still and KNOW.