Twice just this week I've been witness to my husband responding to questions or comments about our form of living. You know I never think too much about it, I mean, its my life. But to hear him answer questions about how we afford to have so many kids and to get compliments on how we manage ministry and family really gets me thinking about how we do what we do. He called it deliberate, this way we go about things. I often feel as if life is happening to me and yet he says that he approaches life this way on purpose.
My husband was raised by his father to be a pastor, on purpose. He was trained up to love others and lead them to Christ and it flowed through every portion of life. The living room and kitchen table were training centers. When I first came into the picture, I was warned that Joshua was being groomed to follow in his father's footsteps and I just needed to go ahead and know that before it was too late. It was already too late for me, I was head over heels. I got caught up in this way of life and now its my own.
In a ministry centered home, things are different. Its not about me and mine but about how can we help you? There can never be too many cups or too many chairs since each one represents another person we can be reaching out to. So many times we live with a plan in mind. An end goal. An attainable future. And then when things go wrong we are crushed and depressed and there is no soothing us. The Bible says that man will make his plans but God will direct his steps. There is nothing wrong with making plans, we just have to realize that the picture is so much greater than what we can see with our own eyes and God has His way for us to follow.
We can paddle out into the waves. We can catch a few, enjoy the surf, revel in the magnificence of the power of the ocean, fully embrace the beauty of the sea. The tide can pull us along and we can lose control of the situation. Maybe the coastline is rocky and the waves dangerous, there are no safe points of exiting the turmoil. Our planned day of relaxation can come to a frightening halt. Just when we are taking steps to give it all up for lost, a beacon of hope shines through and we can drag ourselves to safety on the shore.
In our way of living at times I can feel like that surfer. But if I only ever stay on the shore line where its safe, can I ever bask in the beauty of the breakers? I desire to have a life deliberately patterned to grasp as much of the important things as possible.