I'm gonna go ahead and come out and say it. Last year I worked my tail feathers off and lost 25 pounds. I was so proud of myself and the "new me" that was emerging. I had a system and a goal and I was totally committed. And then some major bumps happened and my attentions were focused on other things and I lost it. Well, I should say, I gained it. All. Right. Back. I was and am so disappointed in myself. Why did I let that happen? How did I lose my equilibrium?
In hindsight, I'm seeing that all my focus was on the diet and the workout plan and life was going along swimmingly. Everybody was in their places and didn't need much management. When that delicate balance teetered, I lost all control.
This time around, I'm trying to keep my sights a little more broad. Be more sensitive to the needs of my family and if the alert goes up, I can stay calm and work with it. I don't like emergencies, and deviations in the plan make me crazy. Such is life.
I'm working on my portion control. You know if I get up early, I go to bed early. If I have an appointment, I don't try to get in an extra workout that day. Morning devotions are doable when I get enough rest the night before. If I have a weekend of church events, its ok to let the house go a little bit. I love reading, but if the man says turn off the light and come to bed, alright then. It is not even humanly possible to be part of every event, party, meeting, et cetera going on in my vicinity.
They say we only have 24 hours in a day. They say if its important to you, you'll make time to get it done. That always makes me feel guilty. There are so many important things that I would love to get done. But when its all over, I feel like my day holds me prisoner. I go to work, and help the kids with homework and do a little housework and boom, what's left? I want to heap up my plate with all the yummy things out there. There's an all you can eat buffet and all my favorite foods are on it. I want successful kids and a happy husband and an excellent prayer life and a group of amazing women to laugh and cry with. I want to read tons of fun and encouraging books. Blogging every day would make me so happy. Workouts and jogging and eating right and losing weight. Volunteering some time and going to every baby shower, birthday party, church event I'm invited to. Museum tours and beach trips and the zoo. A trip to the park every Saturday while also maintaining a spotless house. Ahhh.
God's Word says that a man makes his plans, but the Lord directs his steps. So, I'm taking this in stride. Taking my allotted 24, and I'm asking Him. My choice would be to pile on all the things I love and that are comfortable for me, like a bunch of chocolate eclairs. But my choice and my serving portions would lead me to a fat, lackadaisical way of life, no discipline, no stretching, no hardships. What would be the best choice? What takes precedence over the rest? What do I put on my plate, Lord? The really hard part is resting in His answers and letting the other stuff go.