A Year

It is amazing the difference one year can make. Things are always going wrong and going right and surprising us and boring us to tears. But, there are those times where its as if the clouds part and the sun shines through and the spotlight is centered on my heart and it all blurs. I become oh so reminiscent and gloppy. Last year this Christmas was one of the hardest and loneliest we've ever had. We had won some fights and lost a few and all just felt so raw and exposed. Even the little ones felt it and none of the family was in town so it was unsettlingly quiet and even though we pushed through the old family traditions we just felt hollow.

This year has been a rough one and we've grown a lot and moved forward but this Christmas its gonna be different. My house is gonna be full of loud, full of running kids and laughing grandparents and mommies just trying to keep track of everybody's shoes and socks. Its gonna be crazy and messy and so wonderfully the opposite of last year's solemnity.

Christmas is one of those parts of the year where the regular motions of life make a side step and we intentionally glance around and look closer at what we hold right here in our two hands. Mountain tops or valley lows we are in this together and it feels like family.